A Florida man wasn’t happy with the way the Hillsborough County Sheriff’s Office treated him and wasn’t afraid to tell them — 2,297 times. Keith Lukas, 43, pleaded guilty on Tuesday to calling the Hillsborough County Sheriff’s Office non-emergency line a total of 2,927 times between May 1, 2012, and Dec. 5, 2013. When Lukas called, he would belittle the dispatchers and use vulgar language while griping about how the Sheriffs had treated him in the past, WTSP-TV reported. Lukas has past arrests for battery, DUI, disorderly conduct and criminal mischief, according to NBC Miami. Authorities said Lukas would typically call several times a day. Sometimes, he would eventually hang up. Other times, dispatchers disconnected him after determining he did not need police or medical help, the Tampa Bay Times reported. Lukas was sentenced to probation. As part of the plea deal, he promised he would only contact the Hillsborough County Sheriff’s Office if he had a legitimate need for law enforcement or medical services, according to BayNews9.com.
Say what you will about Keith Lukas taking up Florida officers (valuable?) time, but don’t you ever say that the man isn’t the most dedicated complainer in the game. Just gets loaded in the middle of the afternoon and you know what he decides to do? Call the police a few dozen times and complain that they weren’t very nice to him in the past. He’s like your girlfriend when you fuck up one time and she brings it up multiple times a day for the next few years. Maybe an officer made fun of the fact that he looks like he just came out of a morgue and Keith feels like he’s entitled to an apology. I’m not here to debate the specifics of why Keith feels he was wronged, I’m just saying he damn sure felt like they owed him something. 2,000 phone calls in a year is mind blowing by the way. I avoid talking on my phone at all cost. Texting is literally the only form of social interaction I’m capable of at this point. I haven’t made 100 phone calls in the last year while Keith is chatting up law enforcement that many times a day.
PS-People who leave voicemails are basically the worst humans on this planet. You think I have time to sit there at listen to your shit? It takes like 5 minutes to listen to one voicemail. If I don’t answer my phone, hang up and text me like you live in the post fucking Civil War Era.